Babies...

Don't worry...I'm not pregnant. :)

I was going to wait on this post until later in the month - closer to the 26th. But after spending so much time yesterday reading the story of Audrey Caroline , I had no choice but to write this post today.

Those of you who know us know that we had a baby before the girls. His name was Billy. He was born April 26th, 1999. He passed a blood clot through his heart before he was delivered. He was stillborn. The year that followed his death and birth was by far the most difficult year of my life. (which says a lot if you know all the things that followed such as my arnold chiari malformation and subsequent brain surgery, my mom's brain aneurysm, and of course, Katie's autism diagnosis). I read a post today on Alice's blog that made me think a lot about how God uses suffering and trials in our lives. In retrospect, I know that Billy's death was used greatly by God in my life, in Bill's life and in the lives of our family and friends. Obviously, it would not have been my choice for my child to taken from me before he was able to live on this earth - but that was God's choice and God's purpose. As the years go by, God has allowed me to meet and know many other families who have suffered the loss of a child. I wonder sometimes if God was preparing me to minister to others. I also know that through our loss of Billy, the subsequent births of our two daughters, Mary and Katie - even with her autism diagnosis - have been that much sweeter. We always tell Mary that God gave her to us to heal our broken hearts - and sometimes when I'm having a bad day she'll remind me that she is God's gift to me. How true that is.
Hug your "babies" today and tell them how thankful you are that God has given them to you as your special gifts.